On Our Layoff and the Illiterate South Florida Chronicle

Categories: El Jefe
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Some illiterate little paper I had never heard of -- and never hope to hear of again -- the South Florida Chronicle -- was reveling this morning in the fact that I had to lay off an employee a couple of weeks ago.

Sorry, you simpletons. There were no big layoffs. One person in Miami and one in Fort Lauderdale. I was sad as hell to let go Sebastian del Mármol, one of the most talented journalists I have ever worked with and a great friggin' guy. It is a tough economic time, and we are pushing through.

But this publication is successful. Last night, more than 1,600 people attended our Iron Fork event in Wynwood. Our freelance budgets have been increased -- no, don't think about asking me for work, Chroniclites -- and we have shuffled around some people.

The Chronicle claimed New Times has been trashing it around town for weeks. I don't know howinhell we could trash something we didn't even know existed. Nor can I comprehend why that paper would write such garbage without giving me a call. You know, it's called reporting, you Neanderthal twerps.

But anyway, I am sorry for these numbskulls, Sebastian. You are a great dude!

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6 comments
Kidchronic
Kidchronic

Chuck I never saw this before!!! Nice work buddy now I can have some more fun with you!!! -Kid Chronic

Douglasc
Douglasc

The editor of the Chronicle writes like a 12 year old. The guy attacks businesses in South Florida to get attention. The only way he gets traffic to his site is by re-posting shots of naked women and ghetto fights from WSHH. Today is the 21st of October, has anyone seen the October issue yet? No, because it's not out yet! Our business used to advertise with that rag. The June issue came out June 30th, and who finds pleasure in other people getting laid off? What a pathetic loser.

Anon
Anon

ok, how about weeding out the constant stream of typos, grammar errors, and misspellings? hell, i'd say go as far as edit mixed metaphors out of the comment section!

Stefan Kamph
Stefan Kamph

"Thirdly I could download a myriad of different editing widgets from WordPress that are smarter, faster, and more efficient (not to mention cheaper) than any human that ever existed. So take a deep breathe..."

If the people wishing me out of a job are all of this intellectual caliber, maybe things aren't so bad.

Truth
Truth

"The Chronicle claimed"Who the hell is the chronicle?!!!

Sdmarmol
Sdmarmol

you ain't so bad yourself chuck. long live new times!

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