Our feet are our most utilitarian and thankless body part. Laboring under the weight of our body to trudge us from place to place, all the while getting little love from anyone outside of foot fetish message boards. Sometimes you just have to pamper your paws. Though, as two dumb Florida criminals can tell you, it's best if you don't use a stolen credit card to do so.
This past Saturday, Jonah Troutman, a 27-year-old homeless man in Volusia County, found a credit card on the ground. Armed with the plastic, Troutman forwent a shopping spree for food or other necessities and decided his first stop would be Nancy's Nails.
Nancy, or someone who worked for her, gave Troutman a $20 pedicure. When it came time to pay up he pulled out the found credit card. It was declined twice, and eventually the nail salon employee called the cops. According to the Smoking Gun
, the fancy footed thief told the officer that "the card was a gift card and that finding it was a blessing from God." Troutman ended up in jail for illegal use of a credit card.
Troutman's spiritual brother in crime had far fancier footy flairs in mind. Eduardo Diaz Jr., a 22-year-old Miami resident, ended up in Miami yesterday at the posh Waterside Shops and decided to do some Gucci shoe shopping. Ah, a man after Trina's own heart
The clerk at the Gucci store rang up Diaz's $4,000 purchase, and he pulled out a credit card. The card was declined, which prompted a call to American Express. Turns out it wasn't his card. Diaz fled the store, but was found by police and arrested
at a nearby restaurant.
Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.