Mugshots Friday: Polar Man, Infinite Wisdom, and a Good, Reliable Goon

​​Every Friday, Riptide brings you the most eye-catching mugshots taken the previous week (or thereabouts) in Miami-Dade County. Yes, there is some mockery of bad neck tattoos, but also adulation directed at perps who just plain look more badass than we ever will. This is the italicized intro to that series.

​Arrested: 1/24
Charged with: Cocaine possession
We don't know whether to throw a skeeball at his face or save the ice caps from melting so he doesn't drown.

​Arrested: 1/20
Charged with: Attempted strongarmed robbery and assault
This guy just looks like a ton of fun. He looks like he's from Minnesota and he invents amazing sports when he's drunk and bored, and he had a great ska record collection in junior high.

​Arrested: 1/22
Charged with: Battery
We were doubting the veracity of the "infinite wisdom" tattoo (because of the whole arrested for battery thing) but that all-knowing squint confirms that this is indeed Miami-Dade County's version of the monk that you climb the Tibetan mountain to ask advice of. Only thing is, about 46-percent of the time, he's going to punch you in the face.