CSI: Miami is Dead, But Here Are Ten Other Shows That Need Miami Spinoffs

Categories: Flotsam
csimiamiisunglasses.jpg
Did you hear the news? CSI: Miami has been canceled. Dramatically remove your sunglasses in silence to pay your respects.

The series' execution puts a temporary end to one of our favorite Hollywood hack practices: take a successful movie or television show, and for a lazy sequel or spin-off transport the exact same concept to sunny, sexy Miami. See our top ten favorite examples here. Hopefully, CSI: Miami's demise doesn't end the practice once and for all (hey, the exposure is good for tourism). Here's some ideas for other potential cheesy Miami-set spin-offs of successful television shows.

30 Rock: Doral
Liz Limón is the headwriter of Spanish-language variety show La Hora Jiggles (very loosely based on Sábado Gigante, as 30 Rock is very loosely based on SNL). The lowly rated show is hosted by her longtime friend Jenna Machado (who hosts the show in low-cut tops and jumps around a lot) until Telemendo executive Juan Donaghy decides to add bad boy comedian Horatio Suarez (played by Horatio Sanz) as the new co-star of the now-bilingual show. Liz Limón will be played by a former Venezuelan beauty queen, but because she wears cardigans and glasses there are constant odd jokes about how she is fat, ugly and undesirable.

Law & Order: Surfside
Executive producer Dick Wolf tries to give the familiar L&O format one more revamp. This time by following the police of the Surfside PD as the do nothing all day but sit around and give people tickets for driving 5 miles over the speed limit or occasionally jay walking. The series is cancelled half way through the first episode, and we never get to see the "Order" segment in which the criminals are forced to wait in an overly crowded clerk of courts office to pay their fine.

Work of Art: Wynwood
While the often forgotten Bravo reality show depends on the lie that actual artistic talent is all that is needed to rise to the top of the art world, the Wynwood edition takes a more realistic approach. Contestants are judged on factors like the quality of liquor sponsor at their next opening, how influential their social circle is, and press mentions. Like the real art world, the judges will pretend to give favor to female, minority and gay artists unless their work deals with issues of femininity, ethnicity and queerness in ways that make the straight, white art world aristocracy a bit too uncomfortable.

How I Met Your Mother: Miami Gardens
Long story short: at King of Diamonds. Don't even think I'm about to pay child support, though.

Breaking Bad: Homestead
It's pretty much exactly like the original Breaking Bad, except the main character isn't dying from advanced lung cancer. He doesn't even care much about providing for his family. He's just an asshole who has no problem skirting the law and selling meth, and probably some crack too. Lets be honest, this is set in Miami. Ain't a drug dealer here who feels bad about what they do.


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charlie_oscar
charlie_oscar

Miami CSI was okay...not for the nerdy aspect of it - and over-written scripts...but the hi-def scenery made it worth a look. The red headed deewshbag made the show painfull on any level of consumption but I would mute the sound. Dude was a dewsh going back to his time on the NYPD show...

But...Don Johnson is a dewshbag and always was...so maybe it's in the water?

Torres305
Torres305

I love it !!! I would watch every single show.

seep
seep

Game of Krome?

Vice-Queen Maria
Vice-Queen Maria

I want to see Sherlock Holmes tackle the Chupacabras of Hialeah.

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