How Do You Know When You're a Real Floridian?
Earlier this year, we asked the question, "How do you know you're a real Miamian?" Which obviously got us thinking: How do you know when you're a real Floridan?
This is a state full of retirees and transients. Even if you were born here, there's a good chance your parents probably weren't. So how does one define true Floridianess? We took our best shot at it with this quiz.
The test is pretty simple: For every bullet point you answer "Yes," go ahead and give yourself a point. The scoring key is at the end.
- It's officially fall when you can keep your a/c off for at least 30 minutes and not sweat to death.
- You travel for two hours and have to remind yourself you're not in a completely different state or county, but still in Florida.
- You've done the stingray shuffle, and we don't mean on the dance floor.
- You know someone who was involved in a "weird Florida news" story that went viral.
- Seeing dolphins or manatees no longer impresses you.
- You either get really offended when people call you a Southerner or really offended when people say you're not a real Southerner. Either way, you have strong feelings on the matter.
- You actually root for Florida sports teams (and you understand why we included this. Seriously, get out of our state Jets fans. Go back to Jersey.).
- And, of course, you have felt personally victimized by a Florida sports team.
- You honestly can't fathom the idea that people don't know how to swim.
- Publix Subs > Subway Subs
- Big Foot isn't real, but you haven't completely written off the existence of the Skunk Ape.
- Your winter wardrobe consists of a few hoodies and a denim jacket (often worn with flip flops).
- Your hometown (or at least the first city in Florida you lived in) is now almost unrecognizable thanks to the building boom.
- You could go to the beach every Saturday and Sunday of a month and still never wear the same swimsuit.
- You're sick of seeing mega-lawyer John Morgan's fat face telling you he's "For the People" during every commercial break.
- You've gotten sunburned in December.
- A good college football season means your team beat Florida, Florida State and/or Miami (or, obviously, the two teams on that list that aren't your team).