Floridian Steals Neighbor's Obama Sign Because It Tells Burglars Unarmed "Half-Wits" Live There

Categories: Crime, Politicks
When a man in Sarasota repeatedly took Obama signs off his neighbor's lawn, he wanted to let her know it wasn't just vandalism. See, he was looking out for everyone's safety by not letting burglars know that weak-kneed, Second Amendment-hating liberals lived there. He even sent her a postcard helpfully explaining his motives.

"When thieves ... see pro-Democrat yard signs, they automatically think that the subdivision is filled with retards and half-wits," the man wrote to his neighbor. "It is common knowledge amongst burglars that Democrats are anti-gun."

Really! The woman, Jill Green, even gave WWSB, the local ABC affiliate, a copy of the postcard. Check it out:

via WWSB ABC 7
The neighbor signed the postcard "Bat Masterson," a 1950s NBC show, which at least narrows down the suspects to the elderly. (In a Sarasota subdivision, that's about as helpful as looking for a German in a black turtleneck at Art Basel.)

On the flip side of the card are photos of Obama and Reagan, with ZERO and HERO respectively beneath their faces.

"As far as I know, no one else has received a postcard like this," Green tells WWSB. "It was scary and it was creepy, because the person says they lived around the corner from me."

Come on, Jill -- the guy's just looking out for you! Even better, he's made it abundantly clear that he's heavily armed and willing to use his arsenal.

What's there to worry about?

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18 comments
StupidGunNuts
StupidGunNuts

Jeez, another paranoid schizo in waiting like George Zimmerman.   Wake up and stop being so scared you big babies.

Alexander Fernandez
Alexander Fernandez

I'm sure they were shocked. The Obama supporter is usually the one trying to get other people's money and property.

Pierre Bernardo
Pierre Bernardo

WAIT - I thought conservatards said that they needed their guns to defend themselves from the "Obama thugs". Now they claim Obama voters are unarmed?

Morris Solow
Morris Solow

Oh, Gee Wiz...I Would Put Up An Obama Sign Just To Watch Them Bleed. ROMNEY/RYAN 2012

Geoff Paugam
Geoff Paugam

@Joel Nunez, this LIB has enough balls to dip into Romney's mouth and yours too!

Felix L Ricardo
Felix L Ricardo

Why are you guys fighting over who gets to fuck you over the hardest?

Daniel Solares
Daniel Solares

I can tell u first hand I live in Floirda and Voted for Obama, Come steal my sign and you will find out I also own an AK 47 and baby desert eagle .45 legally!!!!

Lynne Dear
Lynne Dear

the title alone had me laughing loudly!!!

Daniel Solares
Daniel Solares

so what does it say about Romney signs? thieves live there hmmmmm

Geoff Paugam
Geoff Paugam

Funny cause if they come into this pro-Obama household they're not gonna leave out this biatch courtesy of GLOCK!

Eric Puntervold
Eric Puntervold

Funny how New Times chooses not to report all the vandalizing of houses and cars and sign stealing of Mitt Romney supporters..

Amanda Lynn
Amanda Lynn

Too funny. He's giving a good excuse for stealing his neighbor's property

j.pollo
j.pollo topcommenter

"...he's made it abundantly clear that he's heavily armed and willing to use his arsenal". Does that mean we should also be worried about all the men with penises and willing to use them?

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