Dolphins Rout Bills 24-10, Are Knocked Out of the Playoffs Anyway

Categories: Sports
i.jpg
The Miami Dolphins trounced the Bills yesterday behind a 3 TD day from Reggie "LaMontelle Pussyhammer" Bush, a balls-up performance from Reshad Jones and an efficient day from Ryan Tannehill that saw the rookie join the 3,000-yard club for the season. However, a few hours later the Fins found out they were out of the playoffs once the Bengals beat the Steelers.

Truthfully, the Dolphins had a miniscule chance of sneaking in to the postseason but many fans and players held out hope. All that faded once the Bengals kicked a game-winning field goal late against the Steelers. Still, the Dolphins - and particularly Ryan Tannehill - have shown some steady improvement over the last couple of weeks and have done so with a patchwork secondary and receiving corps. The moxie is impressive but the talent level is not there quite yet. Here's to hoping that Tannehill continues to grow and show improvement and not just against teams with losing records.

Let's hit some of the highlights:

- Reggie Bush was fucking balls out awesome yesterday. With Vagina Feet Daniel Thomas on the IR, LaMontelle got the lion's share of work out of the backfield and he showed why his balls are the biggest on Earth. Reggie had 115 all-purpose yards, including 65 yards on the ground (with a 1-yard run after a long Tannehill scamper) and two receiving TDs of 17 and 12 yards. BAWSE!

LAMONTELLE.jpg
We should note that we have no idea why Reggie hasn't been a larger part in the passing game and it required Daniel Thomas going down plus a depleted receiving corps for this coaching staff to figure out that he's a weapon in the air, but that's just how the Dolphins roll. We surely hope this has nothing to do with driving down his price in the free agency market or anything fucking stupid like that *COUGHITTOTALLYDOESCOUGH*

- The Dolphins also ran for 182 yards on the ground behind Lamar Miller's 73-yard performance. Kid is a homerun waiting to happen and he'll be fun to watch in 2013.

- Ryan Tannehill had another efficient game, throwing for 2 TDs and no interceptions in addition to 45 yards rushing including a 31-yard dash that is now the longest run in franchise history. Tannehill also joined the Dolphins' own '3,000 yards in a season' club on the afternoon, only the 5th Miami QB to do so. BREAKING RECORDS ON THE REG = GOOD. Since that loss to Buffalo 5 weeks ago, the kid has gotten better and better, completing close to 60 percent of his passes and only one interception since Buffalo.

- Safety Reshad Jones had yet another fantastic game, snatching 2 fumbles and intercepting the Bills at the 1-yard line after jumping through the air like cheetah to snag the Ryan Fitzpatrick pass. The interception stopped Buffalo's final drive and allowed the Dolphins to run out the clock. Jones then celebrated the play with a quick homage to former Dolphin Vontae Davis in a way that would make Vontae's grandma proud.

x350.jpg
- The defense gave up a net 154 yards on the ground to the Bills but managed to keep Ryan Fitzpatrick, Stevie Johnson, C.J. Spiller and Scott Chandler mostly in check despite having something named Dimitri Patterson playing cornerback for us. Hats off to Kevin Coyle on a great scheme Sunday against the Bills' multi-faceted offense.

The Dolphins next travel to New England to finish off the season this Sunday and a win there (resulting in an 8-8 season finish) would go a long way towards ensuring a lot of jobs around the organization, including Jeff Ireland's as GM. A loss there and there's zero improvement.  It's just another losing, 7-9 season of a Dolphins team that is maybe sometimes meh okay possibly good from time to time against very bad teams but not talented enough to legitimately compete for the playoffs. Time will tell. In the meantime:

6a00e39820c91c8833017ee5255bd8970d-500wi.jpg
The Miami Dolphins will finish off their season this Sunday in Foxboro against the New England Patriots. Kickoff has been moved to 4:25 p.m.

Follow Miami New Times on Facebook and Twitter @MiamiNewTimes.
My Voice Nation Help
0 comments

Now Trending

Miami Concert Tickets

From the Vault

 

Loading...