Drinking Booze on the Beach May Soon Actually Be Legal in Miami Beach

Categories: News
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It's not uncommon to see people getting blitzed on the sands of South Beach, but it's technically illegal. City Attorney Jose Smith decided in 2010 that even the practice of hotels serving cocktails to their guests on the beach was illegal.

Well, after apparently realizing that everyone does it anyway, the city of Miami Beach might finally legalize some drinking on the beach.

According to The Miami Herald, the Neighborhood and Community Affairs Committee will consider whether to legalize "the sale, service, possession and consumption of alcoholic beverages within designated approved beach concession" areas. Now city staff is moving ahead with the proposal, and a City Commission approval would start a discussion with hotels, businesses and residents to decide on new rules.

Sadly, those new rules probably won't allow you to pack up a cooler full of Bud and wheel it on down to the beach. Your habit of grabbing a "Call a Cab" at Wet Willie's and bringing it back to your beach towel also won't be legalized, either. Because, of course not, this is Miami Beach. Half of the city's entire economy is based on finding new ways to get more money out of the wallets of people who just want to get drunk.

Alcohol vendors would need to be licensed (and would most likely be hotels), and drinkers could only consume in designated zones. The city might also demand fees or a cut of the sales.

Of course, not everyone is happy with the idea.

"Drunks on the beach are a terrific advertisement for our city, are they not? (Note that this is sarcasm...)," Jo Manning, a Miami Beach resident who is apparently unaware she is a resident of Miami Beach, to commissioners according to the Herald. "I see more and more tourists with children on our beach. Why expose this positive tourist element to rowdy, out of control drunks?"

Eh, from what we see, people who brings their kids to the beach are usually the ones most in need of a drink.

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14 comments
internetinternet
internetinternet

Anything the frauds in government in Miami Beach propose is suspect.  Kickbacks and increased arrests will result from the selective enforcement of these zones.  Another scandal coming in two years if they propose a zone of alcohol.  The largest fraud in Miami Beach government is their zoning.  Miami Beach is the king of fraudulent conditional use permits. 

Ronald Wahl
Ronald Wahl

I damn near went to jail because of this .....

Monica Talavera
Monica Talavera

yes it is illegal. I got a $50 ticket last year for 2 beers and we had just walked up to the beach, didn't even give me a chance to throw it away.

Gustavo Rey
Gustavo Rey

Well its basically legal as long as ur not with kids or making a mess with bottles or cans all over if the cops see u and all ur trash is in order they wont fck with you!

Miami New Times
Miami New Times

Phil, there's a beach for that. It's called Haulover.

Phil Ramirez
Phil Ramirez

Of course... Next? Full nudity, everything to cater european visitors.

natalo45
natalo45

Pretty soon the entire beach from 1st street to 50th street will be lined with all-weather, solar-powered slot machines. The new Parking Meters of the Desperate Municipalities. Apparently it is too obvious to just have the police billy club tourists and steal their wallets. 

Bigdic
Bigdic topcommenter

@Monica Talavera You fucking slut, you should have been fined or thrown in jail. Leave your trash like yourself at home. Bet you're a fucking whore hispanic or nigger or what's the difference anyway.

Bigdic
Bigdic topcommenter

@Gustavo Rey Hey asshole, you're either pregnant or you're not, there's no inbetween so shit for brains let's let this go. No such thing as "Basically" yes or no fucknuts.

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