Florida's Best, Worst, and Weirdest Bills as Tallahassee's 2013 Session Kicks Off

Well, hello there, Florida Legislature.

Every spring, they pour into Tallahassee like a gaggle of clowns falling out of a tiny car, except much less funny and far more harmful to Florida's residents. They're members of the Florida House of Representatives, and as 2013's legislative session opens this week, they're set to wreak havoc on the Sunshine State yet again.

As a service to our readers, we've combed through more than 500 bills already filed to find the best, the worst, and the weirdest in this session.

The Best
Bill: "Wine," sponsored by Reps. Frank Artiles and Dana Young
The gist: Legalizes larger containers of wine
Our take: Sometimes a box of Merlot just isn't enough. Introducing: WineTubz™

Bill: "Protest Activities," sponsored by Rep. Tom Rooney
The gist: Prohibits protests within a set distance of funerals and memorial services
Our take: Suck it, Westboro Baptist Church!

Bill: "Search and Seizure of Portable Electronic Devices," sponsored by Rep. Carlos Trujillo
The gist: Prohibits police from tracking you via your phone's GPS without a warrant
Our take: Yes, police can actually do this without a warrant right now. (Stares panicked around the office. Chucks phone out the window. Sprints away.)

Continue to the next page for the Worst and the Weirdest...