Meet the Florida Man Who Wants To "Become" a Disposable Maxi-Pad

Categories: WTF Florida
When Riptide first saw headlines about "Pad Gardner," our initial thought process went like this: "Please don't be from Florida, please don't be from Florida ... CRAP!" Then, we thought, "Please be a joke, please be a joke ... CRAP!"

Yes, Pad Gardner is from Panama City, Florida, and no, his dream to "become" a Maxi-Pad does not appear to be a made up Internet thing. Tweet him @TheFemininePad ladies! (Seriously, though, you can.)

The Daily Dot has done some serious web journalism to get to the bottom of perhaps the strangest dream in all of the Sunshine State, which is really saying something.

Here's what they found about Gardner. He listed four goals for himself in 2013:
  1. To change my legal name to "Pad"
  2. To start preparing for life as a feminine pad.
  3. To set a World Record for having the largest Pad collection.
  4. To become a pink (not green or purple!) disposable him, er, Pad, er, both.
Want to learn more about Pad's journey? Watch his Q&A You-Tube video, where you get a closer look into the man. It's like Inside the Actors Studio, but without James Lipton and infinitely more terrifying.

Before you go judging Gardner (too late?), he wants you to know this is all for a good cause. Next month, he will be doing a Walk Across America to benefit his favorite cause, Toxic Shock Sydrome from tampons. In addition he plans on donating his entire stash of pads, AND HIMSELF OF COURSE, to the padless women of America. "Currently I own 1407 pads and 57 packs of pads. ... I am planning to donate myself and all the pads in the collection to women in need of pads once I have become a pad finally," Pad says on his YouTube page.

Pad isn't trying to shake the Pad community boat however, saying he wants to be treated like "any other normal pad, which probably means getting tossed into the trash."


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Odysseus Duran
Odysseus Duran

Que ganas de comer pinga...... Caballero!! I don't know who's more fucken looney, Mr. Pad for wanting to be one, Miami News Times for posting this, or me for reading it..! The world has gone mad, I'm telling you...! MAD!!! Muahahaha!!

Erik Smith
Erik Smith

Whatever IT is . I mean PAD... has some mental problems maybe. Just throwin that one out there.

Jen Die
Jen Die the headline

Mary Jane Lash
Mary Jane Lash

good cause ok but sooooooo strange and yes always from Florida seriously we are not all like this...LOL

Micah Mae
Micah Mae

He's not a pad, he's a douche.


Someone please put him down.


There was an oooooold Saturday Night Live skit in which Prince Charles turns himself into a tampon in order to, uh, live in Camilla.

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