Florida Chick-fil-A Vandalized With "We Love Cock"

Categories: WTF Florida

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Vandals up in Broward seem to have totally missed the point. Despite Chick-fil-A's well known homophobic stance, three men were caught spray painting anti-gay slurs on the restaurant's location up in Davie like "fag" and "we love cock."

See also: Even Miami's Chick-Fil-As Were Packed With Homophobes Today

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via NBC6
Of course, painting the message "We Love Cock" on a Chick-fil-A seems pretty uncontroversial to us. Chick-fil-A is a chicken restaurant. Much of the chicken meat they use comes from castrated roosters, and cock is just another name for a rooster.

In fact, Chick-fil-A's customers must be some of the biggest cock-lovers in the country. It's like they can never get enough of that cock. They are literally so cock hungry, they wait in line to get that thick, juicy cock morning, noon and night. Some of them like to savor cock first by sucking the cock a little bit first. Others like to make sure the cock is covered in gooey sauce before they shove that cock down in the back of their throats. Most customers usually take multiple cocks at a time.

Chick-fil-A obviously also likes to get that cock between their buns. Usually with a few pickles in their too. Chick-fil-A's buns are pretty loose, so just shoving cock in between them is never enough. Of course, Chick-fil-A has lighter menu items too for those watching their weight. So they like to toss the salad real good before they put the cock in there. Some customers like to get their cock in wraps, but a surprising number seem to prefer unwrapped cock (despite warnings from their doctor).

See also: I Want to End the Conflict Between Chick-fil-A and the LGBT Community

So, it's just a factual statement that anyone who either works or eats at a Chick-fil-A loves cock. Duh. That would be like spray painting "Beef is Good" on a Burger King.

Though, its those other messages that leave us scratching our head.

Maybe the vandals thought that this was an authorized CFA commercial?

Or maybe it's some post modern meta-protest.

Or maybe they just really share Chick-Fil-A's love of cock.

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6 comments
Will Mcee
Will Mcee

Homophobic stance? hahaha.....

HarryTheHandyman
HarryTheHandyman

Another winning article from Kyle.  How are you still employed?

John Pearson
John Pearson

I've been boycotting Chick-fil-A since S. Truett Cathy started helping Jim and Tammy Faye Bakker ripping off people on the Bakker's "Christian" Theme park. As Uncle Neil would say S. Truett Cathy is an asshole.

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