Trey Radel, Cocaine-Buyin' Congressman, Is Florida's Answer to Crack-Smokin' Rob Ford

Categories: Politicks

Rob Ford
Florida, usually North America's go-to source for general bizarreness and political corruption, has been watching the saga of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford unfold with a bit of a smirk on our face. Hey, at least none of our mayors smokes crack.

Then Southwest Florida Congressman Trey Radel had to ruin it all by getting charged with trying to buy cocaine from an undercover cop.

As part of an FBI investigation into a coke ring, agents discovered that Radel was one the central dealer's clients. An undercover agent arranged a coke deal with Radel, and he showed up. On October 29, FBI agents went to his apartment to arrest him, though he was never handcuffed or taken to jail.

Of course, Radel and Ford aren't exact analogues. The difference between them is like the difference between coke and crack. Radel is a former TV newsman with a helluva head of hair. Ford is the greatest character Chris Farley will never play. But at the end of the day, crack and coke are the same drug.

They both blamed their coke use on alcohol:

  • "Yes, I have smoked crack cocaine... Probably in one of my drunken stupors, probably approximately about a year ago." -- Rob Ford's initial confirmation
  • "I struggle with the disease of alcoholism, and this led to an extremely irresponsible choice." -- Trey Radel, in a statement released shortly after the incident became public

They're both embarrassed and hope to serve as examples to others as cautionary tales:

  • "It is extremely embarrassing, but I don't know what to say but again I am apologizing. Again, when you're in that state... I hope none of you have ever or will ever be in that state." -- Rob Ford during a news conference after a drunken video surfaced
  • "I am disappointed in myself... I know I have a problem and will do whatever is necessary to overcome it, hopefully setting an example for others struggling with this disease." -- Trey Radel in his statement

They both have unrelated scandals that involved crude lingo:

  • Facing allegations he sexually harassed a female staffer, Ford claimed, "I wanted to eat her pussy... I'm happily married. I've got more than enough to eat at home."
  • A media company Radel owned once registered a number of crude domain names including,, and

They both have some weird racial things:

  • Ford has gotten into trouble for using terms like "Oriental" and "Gino-boy."
  • Radel decided to appropriate Public Enemy's "Fight the Power" as a "conservative anthem."

We'll leave the fact they're both anti-tax right-wingers out of it.

Oddly, despite the fact that Radel lives just two hours from Miami, Ford is the only one of the two who got arrested on DUI charges here once.

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Jen Die
Jen Die

@DF...not only that, he refuses to step down...

Angie Alzola
Angie Alzola

Please... two words for you: Marion Barry. No one can trump the U.S.

D.f. Basora
D.f. Basora

Yeah this jackass congressman voted to drug test welfare recipients but couldn't pass one his own damned self to save his life. Florida, land of opportunity, double standards and two faced politicians

drakemallard topcommenter

Drug Test Elected Officials and Politicians

We the undersigned Citizens of the United States of America, believe it must be manditory for our elected representatives to be of clear mind and sound body, therefore we support action requiring all elected public officials of municipal, county, state or federal office to submit to regular and random supervised drug testing, and that those results be made public and published on a monthly basis in the most accessable manner to the greatest number of people.

Further, that refusal or failure to submit to any drug test automaticly suspends without compensation or pay anyone, from the duties of that office to which they are elected, until that test is properly conducted, and that any subsequent refusal or failure by the same official, automaticly removes said official from elected office permanently, without compensation or pay, and new elections shall be held for that office as soon as logisticly possible, while temporarily an appointee may be allowed to fill that vacated seat.
That Appointee shall be bound by this law to submit to regular and random drug testing, with all penalties enforced as well.

Further, that prior to submission of filings for intent to run for public office, submission to supervised drug testing shall occur, and failure to do so shall be grounds for rejection of any filings for intent.They should also be subject to test on demand by the leaders of the house or senate or the President or VP.They should also have to pass a breathalyzer before entering a government building where the peoples business is conducted.It could be argued, they are operating one of the largest machines on the planet, they are responsible for millions of lives with their actions. We should at least expect them show up for work sober.”

Christopher Jorge
Christopher Jorge

i hope they're all living in a van down by the river soon...

Jeffrey Knight
Jeffrey Knight

Not fat enough, and not obnoxious enough(until you add the demon rum).

Louis Wing
Louis Wing

I mean, Rick Scott HAS to be one something?

J Jess Jessi Abalos
J Jess Jessi Abalos

LOL we have the most corrupt politicians toronto! and don't forget it!

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