Fidel Castro Dragged Into Lindsay Lohan-Barron Hilton Feud

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Hilton's injuries
Over the years, several Americans have sought refuge in Fidel Castro's Cuba for legal and political reasons, but until now, no one has tried to do so because they're afraid of Paris Hilton.

In case you missed Art Basel week's stupidest celebrity gossip, let's get you caught up. Actress Lindsay Lohan was staying at a Star Island mansion possibly rented for the week by New York writer Ray LeMoine. During the week, Paris Hilton's 24-year-old brother, Barron, also popped up at the party pad. LeMoine allegedly wound up punching him in the face. The younger Hilton immediately took to the gossip press to insist Lohan had orchestrated the attack. It's all a big made-for-TMZ mess, yet somehow Fidel Castro is now involved.

The New York Daily News' Confidenti@l gossip column got in touch with LeMoine. He claimed he's in Key West and is trying to flee to Cuba for refuge.

"I'm scared of the Hiltons and Paris' Cash Money crew, so I am seeking refuge in Cuba," he said. "Castro hates the Hiltons and took their Havana hotel in 1959 as a base after conquering Cuba, so they are stoked I'm coming down to hate capitalism. Viva la Lohan!"

Did LeMoine party so hard during Basel week that that statement actually makes sense in his mind? Or is he just trying to get as much ridiculous attention out of this as possible?

The man does know his history at least. The Hiltons' grandfather built the Havana Hilton in the '50s in collaboration with then-President Fulgencio Batista. Castro did indeed turn it into his base of operations in '59 and later renamed it the Hotel Havana Libre.

It's unclear if LeMoine was renting the home himself or where he got the money to do so. He has previously worked as a freelance writer and local news blogger for the New York Times before getting into the nightlife industry. His NYC bar, Heathers, was recently shuttered.

The Daily News goes on to claim that Lohan had nothing to do with the attack and wasn't even at the home when it happened. Their sources say LeMoine returned from a party and wasn't pleased to find Hilton and other youngsters drinking the night away at his home. That's when he hit Hilton with an unknown object, but some reports suggest Hilton took a swing first. The gossips report that Hilton then opened a bottle of Jameson and continued drinking at the mansion for three more hours before calling police. Hilton, meanwhile, is reportedly planning to sue both LeMoine and Lohan.

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Robert Lewis
Robert Lewis

Did this originally appear in The Onion?

Jose Antonio Navarro
Jose Antonio Navarro

Ray LeMoine sounds like he's sketching out from meth amphetamine. The US should just deport everyone involved in that party to Cuba.

Jimmie Miniard
Jimmie Miniard

Bananas Marcy Dalsin do you have ties to this lol!!!


What perhaps makes Lemoine’s latest foray into the scene that more spectacular and extraordinary is that it fits neatly into the type of high stakes background that Lemoine has already carved out for himself as a gonzo writer on the go living incredible adventures, too real for you and me, which raises the question is he really just playing the media (as much as he blogs for it here and there...) or is he really just the out of control egotistical thug that Battered Hilton would like us all to believe he is….?

drakemallard topcommenter

Gone are the days you had to be talented to be famous


What great role models for young women of today. The new The American Dream
Ha the new route to stardom, not talent at anything, just make a goofy sex tape and you're in.She is a real pro when it comes to getting her meat hole filled. Takes a lot of talent!! You on your way kid, keep up the amazing HARD

Mirti Danny
Mirti Danny

Ummmm hes a PUSSY....who gives a fuck...Linday should have beaten his ass herself...

Joey Waves
Joey Waves

thanks for waisting 5 minutes of my day

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