Kiera Wilmot's Failed Science Experiment Brings Out the Racism

Categories: Luke's Gospel

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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. Today, Luke wants to see justice for Kiera Wilmot.

In Bartow, Florida, public school and law enforcement officials are committing a horrible injustice against an exceptionally gifted African-American teenager. By all accounts, 16-year-old Kiera Wilmot is a model honors student. She has good grades and has a perfect behavior record. She's not a kid who skips classes, fights her classmates and teachers, or pulls fire alarms for kicks.

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Norman Braman Won the Battle, but Stephen Ross Is Going to War

Categories: Luke's Gospel

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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke assesses Stephen Ross' next move.

In the battle of Miami billionaires, Norman Braman beat Stephen Ross thanks to Florida House Speaker Will Weatherford. But now the Miami Dolphins owner is ready to go to war after Weatherford killed his chances of getting up to $380 million in taxpayer money to subsidize a roof and other upgrades for Sun Life Stadium.

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BET Columnist Cord Jefferson Can't Hold Me Back

Categories: Luke's Gospel

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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. Today, Luke responds to a BET columnist's criticisms.

Two days ago, Cord Jefferson, a young columnist for BET Networks looking to build a name for himself, wrote a response to my column, "African Americans Need To Use Condoms," claiming I'm wasting time giving out condoms and educating black people about practicing safe sex.

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African-Americans Need to Prevent STDs and Pregnancy

Categories: Luke's Gospel

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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke talks about the importance of safe sex.

When New York-based prophylactics company b Condoms approached me about doing a safe-sex campaign, it was a partnership opportunity I didn't want to pass up. While I've always been a champion for getting freaky, African-Americans need learn to protect themselves first. We're number one in murders, gun violence, poverty, unemployment, teen pregnancies, and getting sexually transmitted diseases. I'm tired of being number one.

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Boston Marathon Bombing Won't Unite Us For Long

Categories: Luke's Gospel

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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking music made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke explains why Americans fuel terrorism.

It's a beautiful thing when Americans come together during a crisis. Whether it's hurricane or a children's massacre or a terrorist act, it's amazing to see us come together in trying times. It's too bad we can't do that when a catastrophe isn't threatening us.

Before Tamerlan and Dzhokhar Tsnarnaev blasted the Boston Marathon and terrorized Bean Town last week, Americans have been at each other's throats over immigration, gun control, the economy, and Jay-Z's and Beyonce's trip to Cuba. And that's just last week.

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State Lawmakers Want To Ruin 4/20 For Everybody

Categories: Luke's Gospel
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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man who made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke says its time to legalize medical marijuana.

Florida lawmakers need to roll up a fat joint and chill out. While the Republican-dominated state legislature moves full speed ahead to ban the sale of bongs and glass pipes, they are ignoring a measure to legalize medical marijuana in the Sunshine State. Legislators must think we're still living in 1936, the year the anti-marijuana film Reefer Madness hit movie theaters across the country.

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Rutgers Scandal Is the Latest Sign the NCAA Sucks

Categories: Luke's Gospel
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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke goes in on the NCAA's plantation blueprint.

The scandal at Rutgers University, where basketball coach Mike Rice was fired after video showed him physically abusing players, once again shows that the NCAA lacks institutional control. Just like the child-abuse cover-up involving former Penn State assistant coach Jerry Sandusky, the NCAA was nowhere to be found as Rice wreaked havoc on these young men.

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Justin Timberlake Sells Records Through Hard Work

Categories: Luke's Gospel
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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke assesses a former boy band member's success.

Justin Timberlake really understands how to sell records. Last week, The 20/20 Experience, his first in seven years, debuted at the top of the Billboard charts. It's the best-selling album of 2013 so far, moving 968,000 units, and the 32-year-old R&B crooner did it by taking it back to the old school of entertainment. He went on a major publicity blitz before the album dropped March 19.

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The First 48 Keeps Miami's Inner City Neighborhoods in the Dumps

Categories: Luke's Gospel
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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke goes after one of the most watched shows on cable television.

I've never been a big fan of the First 48, the reality-TV show that follows homicide investigators working cases that is now in its 12th season. The Miami Police Department is one of nine law enforcement agencies that allows Hollywood-based ITV Studios to film detectives working furiously to solve a murder within the first two days of finding a body. My problem is that the majority of the Miami homicides depicted on the First 48 inevitably originate in Overtown, Liberty City, Little Haiti, and other inner-city neighborhoods.

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Anti-Christian Bigotry Is on the Rise

Categories: Luke's Gospel
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Alex Izaguirre
Uncle Luke, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke assesses the lack of faith in the world.

On February 20, the holy spirit lifted 82-year-old Brownsville resident Emma Anderson. The frail senior citizen belted out gospel hymns as she rode the Metrorail home. Satan and his demons must have heard her angelic singing. A guard from 50 State Security, the company hired by Miami-Dade Transit to watch the stations and rail-cars, brutally yanked her off the train, causing her to slip and fall on the hard concrete floor of the Brickell Station.

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