Lincoln Diaz-Balart's Son Dead at 29

Categories: Politicks

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Rep. Lincoln Diaz-Balart
Lincoln Gabriel Diaz-Balart, the 29-year-old son of former Rep. Lincoln Diaz-Balart and a member of one of Miami's more politically powerful and connected families, passed away over the weekend. No official cause of death has been released. The family is asking for privacy at the time, but noted that the younger Diaz-Balart had suffered with depression.

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Allen West Finally Got a Fox News Gig

Categories: Politicks

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Allen West's entire four years in Washington were essentially a giant performance art piece aimed at Fox News viewers. The Republican rep would bluster at a Muslim constituent that "you attacked us," or claim that 80 sitting Democrats in Congress are secret communists or blabber about gays "breaking down" the military, and Fox News would happily plaster his face all over the airwaves for a few hours.

Now that West is out of Congress, the team finally made their relationship formal this morning, with the network hiring the ex-politico as a contributor.

See also:
- Allen West, Uncut


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Florida Rep. Trey Radel Thinks Public Enemy's "Fight The Power" Is a Conservative Anthem

Categories: Politicks

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Public Enemy's "Fight the Power" may have been one of those politically radical songs to crack the American mainstream, but apparently Rep. Trey Radel (R-Naples) thinks that, "really, if you really get down to it, in many ways reflects the conservative message."

Yes, Radel has decided to join Marco Rubio as the latest hip-hop fan in the Republican party, and gave an interview to Now This News about his love of old school hip-hop.

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Marco Rubio Got an $800,000 Advance on His Book, Finally Paid Off His College Loans

Categories: Politicks

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Throughout his rocket-ship ride to the top of the GOP, Marco Rubio has fought to keep some financial skeletons from tumbling out of his closet. There were thousands in questionable credit card charges, a six-figure student loan debt, the Tally house (shared with David Rivera) that went into foreclosure.

These days, Rubio's accountant can sleep a little easier. The Tea Party wonderboy just released disclosures that show he nabbed an eye-opening $800,000 advance on An American Son, his autobiography, and used the cash to finally pay off that student loan.

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Losing North Miami Mayoral Candidate "Endorsed by Jesus" Says Voters Picked Lucifer

Categories: Politicks

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Apparently Jesus doesn't have as much sway at the polls as you would have imagined. After trumpeting her supposed endorsement by Mr. Jesus H. Christ himself in campaign material, Anna Pierre still came in dead last out of seven candidates in yesterday's North Miami mayoral primary.

So she's responded by claiming that voters have picked Lucifer over Jesus.

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Miami Dolphins Stadium Renovation Was Failing at the Polls Before Tally Killed It

Categories: Politicks, Sports

When the House spiked a bill two weeks ago to let the Miami Dolphins raise bed taxes to fund a stadium renovation, team owner Stephen Ross went ballastic, lashing out at Speaker Will Weatherford for taking away Miami voters' chance to have a say on the project.

He shouldn't have bothered. Results released from early voting before the referendum was canceled in Tallahassee show Dade voters roundly defeating the renovation deal.

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Florida's Republican Director of Hispanic Outreach Is Now a Democrat

Categories: Politicks

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How badly are Republican's efforts to win over Hispanic voters in Florida going? Well, the man once in charge of the effort announced that he's quit the party and is now a registered Democrat.

Pablo Pantoja, the former State Director of Florida Hispanic Outreach for the Republican National Committee, announced in a letter published on Florida Nation that he decided to make the switch after the Heritage Foundation (a powerful conservative think tank run, incidentally, by Marco Rubio's political mentor Jim DeMint) published a controversial report last week on immigration reform.

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North Miami Mayoral Candidate Anna Pierre Claims to Be Endorsed by Jesus Christ

Categories: Politicks

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Anna Pierre has apparently picked up the biggest political endorsement ever in her quest to become mayor of North Miami. She claims that she has the backing of none other than Jesus Christ himself, and is trumpeting the endorsement in campaign material.

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Chuck E. Cheese Games Technically Illegal Under New Anti-Maquinitas Law

Categories: Politicks

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Florida's new law aimed at cracking down on maquinitas and other forms of computerized pseudo-gambling found at so-called "Internet cafes" is so far-reaching it actually outlawed several games found at places like Chuck E. Cheese and Dave & Buster's. However local authorities aren't so keen on enforcing the law at those chain restaurants.

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An Open Letter To Francis X. Suarez: For God's Sake, Hire a Speechwriter

Categories: Politicks
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Dear Francis X. Suarez,

It was with great optimism and endearing faith in the potential of our elected politicians that I clicked on your recent "Open Letter to Miami" in the Huffington Post. Then I read this sentence: "With our magical coast and most enviable weather, a patch work of cultures that makes us as unique as the people that call Miami home we are now at that great intersection where opportunity meets greatness."

The City of Miami is headed towards a crucial mayoral election on November 5, an election you may very well win. By writing this letter I am asking you to hire a speechwriter, for god's sake, so that we never have to suffer through your turgid, punctuation-less prose ever again.

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