We're no judge or jury, but we're guessing Charlie Sheen is headed for the slammer. All the celebrities are doing it. Serving a year is the new having a college degree.
Did you know that back in 1990 Charlie Sheen shot his then-fiancee in the arm, accidentally?
If his
newest arrest results in jail time we're guessing these are the top ten foods Charlie Sheen might miss most illustrated by photo parodies via
Charlie Sheen's mugshot and the
creative commons.
10. Pizza Delivery |
|
| Bro, awesome fuckin pizza dude. |
Not even Charlie Sheen can get a pizza delivered to a jail cell.
9. Burgers with friends |
|
| Totally killer burger. |
Eating burgers with your friends just isn't the same when there's only one place to get em', and you're not allowed to leave.
8. Making Sushi |
|
| Who wants a roll? |
In jail terms, "fresh fish" has a different meaning than at the sushi bar. The only seafood they've got in the joint is 'ya see food, ya eat it.'
7. BBQ |
| |
| Sometimes I dress like a homeless grandpa and cook in the back alley. |
As far as we know, jailhouse bbq's don't exist.
6. Fried Fish Soup |
| |
| Hey, I love fried fish soup. |
If the jailhouse cafeteria is your neighborhood eatery, don't expect to run into any new ones while you're out for lunch.
5. English Muffin |
|
| Yeah |
Sure, you may be able to legally buy one of these in jail, but where would you rather eat one?
4. Cereal for Breakfast |
| http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/">CC BY 2.0 |
| Cereal good. |
If Charlie Sheen has any special cereals he likes he probably won't be able to get them in jail.
3. Ice Cream |
| http://www.flickr.com/photos/8692813@N06/2782332793/ |
| Who screams for ice cream? |
Would an incarcerated Charlie Sheen be able to roll out of his jailhouse bunk at 3 in the morning, head for the freezer and eat a half a case of cookie dough ice cream?
2. Guinea Pig |
|
| I used to have one of these as a pet |
Hey, Peru has been pushing Guinea Pig as a food source outside of South America since the 60's.
1. Waffles |
|
| We come to you from the planet waffletron. |
That's right. Waffles.