We're Auctioning Off Talula! (Updated)
Frank and Andrea know nothing of this, and when they find out will no doubt distance themselves as far as possible from our effort. Please do not allow this to affect the enthusiasm of your bidding -- money talks, and if our highest price tops what they get on their own, they're sure to accept and Short Order will be the new restaurant real estate power player in town. Plus any success with this will likely lead me to auction off my old album collection in this space. (Do I hear an offer for the Red Rubber Ball LP by the Cyrkle?)
We'll start things off with a bid of $5,000 (for the restaurant, not the album). (Note to editor who tends to get nervous over things like this: Worst-case scenario, we end up with the property and turn it into a shop specializing in selling 31 flavors of creamed herring; my own anecdotal research shows there are more Scandinavians and old Jews living in Miami Beach than one might suspect!)
We might also mention that Talula is poised to collect an especially esteemed New Times "Best of Miami" award this week -- opportune timing for the Randazzos, as this can only increase the restaurant value. In fact, to reflect this prestigious honor, we suggest at least $50 be added to any offer.
So...$5,050. Going once...