Tobacco Road's Biggest Slacker Contest With Food Trucks; Weekend Truck Tracker

If this is you, head to Tobacco Road Saturday.

​If you're the kind of person who thinks exercise is walking to the fridge to get more beer, we're talking to you! Get your lazy ass off the couch for just once in your life and head to Tobacco Road for the Biggest Slacker contest this Saturday.

The Biggest Slacker is part of the Tobacco Road Brickell Brewmaster event, which features plenty of beer specials throughout the evening.

Beginning at 6 p.m., contestants pay $15 to sit on a chair. Tobacco Road will provide the beer (or water), and the last person sitting without taking a break for any reason (tip: Watch the beer intake) wins a day's salary, compliments of the Road.

Food trucks will be on hand (ask a buddy to buy you a nosh because you can't get up) until midnight.

DJs Oski and Care Bear will provide the entertainment. There's no cover to watch these lazy bastards just sit there, by the way. 

Here's a complete list of food truck locations for this weekend:

Friday, September 2

Food Truck Fridays at Palmetto Bay. Beautiful setting, but $5 parking fee means a few fewer cupcakes if you're on a budget. Trucks serving from 5:30 to 10 p.m. include Atelier Monnier,
Chamo's on Wheels, CheeseMe, Cheese Steak Gourmet, Happy Greek Chef on 4 Wheels, Dim Ssäm à Gogo, Divan Bakery, Doggie Bag Café (for furry friends), Dolci Peccati Gelato, Kitchen Kabab, Kona Ice, Latin Burger, Mangia Mia, Metro Deli Express, Miso Hungry, Monster Burgers, Papa's Tapas, Red Koi, the Rolling Stove, and Yellow Submarine. 18001 Old Cutler Rd., Palmetto Bay

Food trucks at Tamiami Park tonight from 6 to 11. Parking is free, but no pets or bottles are allowed. Trucks include 90 Miles to Go, Mimi's Café, B.C. Tacos, Churro Mania, CubanCube, Dady's Grill, Dog Eat Dog, Frita Man, gastroPod, Gypsy Kitchen, Kona Ice, Latin House Grill, Marly's Cafe, Mojo on the Go, Ms. Cheezious, Okay! Burger, Overload Food Truck, Pardo's Grill, Perros Express, the Pit Stop, the Pork Shop, El Rey de la Paella, El Rincón del Coquí, Sir Pizza, Subbusters, Sugar Rush, Sugar Yummy Mama, and Yo Mama's Paella and Seafood. Tamiami Park, 10901 Coral WAy, Miami

Saturday, September 3

Whistle Stop Food Truck Rodeo at the Gold Coast Railroad Museum. From 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. dine in an authentic 1940s railroad car and receive free admission to the museum. Trucks include Big Kahuna, Chamo's on Wheels, Che Grill, the Chill Stop, Crepe Outdoors, Divan Bakery, Jefe's Original Fish Taco, Latin Burger, Mangia Mia, Meatballs & ETC, Monster Burgers, Papa's Tapas, and Yellow Submarine. Gold Coast Railroad Museum (Zoo Miami entrance), 12450 SW 152nd St., Miami

Brickell Brewmasters Beer Food Truck event at Tobacco Road from 6 p.m. to midnight. Trucks include Che Grill, Dady's Grill, Dim Ssäm à Gogo, Dog Eat Dog, Dolci Peccati Gelato, the Fish Box, the Flying Saucer, gatroPod, Grill Master Café, Jefe's Original Fish Taco, Latin Burger, the MexZican Gourmet, Ms. Cheezious, Nacho Mama's, Purple People Eatery, the Rolling Stove, Sugar Rush, and Sugar Yummy Mama. Tobacco Road, 626 S. Miami Ave., Miami

Monday, September 5

Food Truck Invasion at Arts Park in Hollywood from 5:30 to 10 p.m. Trucks include CheeseMe, Daddy's Grill, Dim Ssäm à Gogo, Divan Bakery, Dog Eat Dog, Dolci Peccati Gelato, the Fish Box, Grill Master Café, Jefe's Original Fish Taco, the Rolling Stove, Snow Caps, and Sugar Yummy Mama. Arts Park at Young Circle, Hollywood Boulevard and U.S. 1, Hollywood

Speaking of Tobacco Road, watch Emeril Lagasse play the drums in this segment of his Cooking Channel show, The Originals, which was filmed at Tobacco Road earlier this year (can you spot the Short Order blogger in the crowd)?

Follow Short Order on Facebook and Twitter @Short_Order.