Ten Perfect Cocktails For Getting Slutty Halloween Characters in the Sack

photo by Ivon David Rojas

She doesn't look too happy about her costume...maybe it's because her cup is empty? No, the other cup.

​So, I don't particularly care for the word slut, but seriously ladies, most of the stuff you are wearing as a "costume" is really just naughty lingerie meant for the bedroom. In fact, Halloween in Miami is really more of a porn convention, where holiday creativity is willingly replaced with trampy outfits on parade. We've spied everything from the typical French maid, to a super short version of Dorothy's Midwestern gingham. (Uh, I don't think that's what Frank would say they wear in Oz.)

Since the female population is obviously going to great lengths to entice you gentlemen, the least you can do is get the girl a drink. What to buy her at the bar? Intimidated by a S&M construction worker in a spiked bra?

Sure to take you from "Hello, beautiful!" to "Sorry, I don't snuggle," here's our libation line-up for the Halloween party-man with a plan, because at a certain age, "would you like some candy, little girl?" just doesn't quite make the grade.

Oh, and to my fellow female-kind: don't worry, you do look sexy and fabulous. It is indeed Halloween, so let your freak fly.

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​Dorothy
Any cocktail containing a dose of absinthe works for this friendly farm girl. The little green fairy will have her asking to see the man behind the curtain before she leaves Oz. Plus, she already knows what it feels like to wake up in unfamiliar surroundings and have no clue as to how she got there. "Oh my, I really don't think I'm in Kansas anymore. Toto? Is that you licking my face?"

Yandy.com

​Sexy Construction Worker
A girl in a hard hat can totally take down shots with the boys, so line up those very effective Jager Bombs and watch the walls come tumbling down. She's used to lifting large objects, and she's always on top of the situation. "Wow, it's so big and heavy!"