Here's What to Eat if Mitt Wins

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6. Tacos Republicans are big fans of Mexican food. On a trip to San Angelo, Texas, about three years ago I found myself in the most delicious Mexican restaurant, filled with nothing but cowboy hats. The food can stay. The Mexicans, however, they've got to go.
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5. Ma Po Tofu This is a popular Sichuan dish is sold on the streets throughout Beijing. Republicans are hard at work devising a way to bastardize the much-loved dish striking an unprecedented gastrointestinal blow to the heart of mainland China. There are many variations, however, it generally contains cubed tofu in a spicy, numbing sauce with fermented black beans served with either beef or pork. China and the U.S. continually lock horns in trade disputes and Republicans see the fast growing country as a threat to America's worldwide dominance.


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