Complex.com: Wood Tavern One of Miami's Douchiest Bars

Categories: Booze Hound

woodtaverntacotuesday.jpg
Wood tavern via Facebook
Douchey places do not host Taco Tuesday...
It's Friday and I've had a long, slightly lousy week. I'm sure a lot of you have, too. Basically, I'm just sitting here waiting for 5 p.m. to roll around so I can get a beer. Wood Tavern is a good choice to get my evening drink on.

It's inexpensive, laid back, local, and has a kick-ass patio. It's a place to meet friends, grab a few drinks, and have fun. They have Taco Tuesday. Wood Tavern is a lot of things. One thing it's not: Douchey!

Apparently, however, some people think otherwise. And those people don't even live here. Wood Tavern just made the list of the 25 Douchiest Bars in Miami on Complex.com Do you know them?

They describe themselves as "the premier multi-media platform for the most influential young male consumers. This discerning audience is driven by style, music, sneakers, sports, games, gear and girls. Complex Media initially reaches these ahead-of-trend influencers through its uniquely credible, authentic viewpoint and is further amplified by its unparalleled social influence."

Oh...and they're (of course) located in New York City. Not Miami. Which makes them kinda underqualified to rank the douchiest bars in Miami.

Look, that's not to say that there are no douchey bars in Miami. And some of the ones on the list are resoundingly for d-bags. Their review of LIV ("only fun if you're in VIP, and into LMFAO, gelling your hair vertically, and applying copious amounts of self tanner.") was kinda funny.

But they described Foxhole as a "mancave" filled with men "left alone in this bar for so long they've become a sort of feral animal." They advised us to "avoid the bruises and the bros and just stay home" and away from Purdy Lounge.

According to these New Yorkers, Cafeina is a "hotbed for uncool" located "on the mainland". The mainland. Known to Miami residents as the place to go to avoid douchebags.

And Wood Tavern. Poor, undouchey, Wood Tavern. Here's what they said about Wood:

" Let's say you go to a bar, and an entire rugby team tries to talk you into giving them a piggyback ride. If you think that's a funny pick-up line, then you're a douche, and you'd fit right in at Wood Tavern." I've been to Wood Tavern and I've never had an entire rugby team ask for a piggyback ride. Maybe cause I don't attract douchebags. Or go to douchey bars!

Look. Haters gonna hate. I get that. But hate on your own town -- not ours.

I have a call in to the editors of complex.com. If and when they return my call, I'll ask them to meet me for a drink at Wood Tavern next time they're in Miami. I'm waiting for the call. Because. Ya know. Only a douchey person wouldn't return a phone call -- right?

Follow Laine Doss on Twitter @LaineDoss and Facebook.

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Location Info

Map

Wood Tavern

2531 NW 2nd Ave., Miami, FL

Category: Music

LIV

4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach, FL

Category: Music

Foxhole Bar

1218 14th Court, Miami Beach, FL

Category: Music

Cafeina

297 NW 23rd St., Miami, FL

Category: Music

Bongos Cuban Café - CLOSED

601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami, FL

Category: Music


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14 comments
TeoMendez
TeoMendez

That whole article was written from internet sourced information. I don't think the author has been to more then 2 of the places on the list. I wouldn't get to upset about it, typical Manhattan douchery thinking of Miami of their little party fiefdom :)

PinkDucky
PinkDucky

Douchey places do not host Taco Tuesday, Whiskey Wednesdays, Sunday Mini Markets that support local businesses and thrive as well as Wood has! This elitist New York writer is just hating that Miami can rival some of the hipster BK bars she probably frequents. Keep up the good work Wood we love you!

mikemoskos1
mikemoskos1

Not sure about the view on that patio though; you'd think the owners could at least plant a vine to cover up the home with prison bars view. Doesn't inspire me to head over for some libations. 

sofro83
sofro83

i know whats going on here.. NY is hating on us... that's all! Miami Is growing and become quite a nice social gathering.. It's ok New Yorkers you can come too! 

jazz
jazz

not an avid reader complex or the new times (saw this link on Wood's facebook), but i'm pretty sure the complex writer is from miami. also, there are douches everywhere (yes, even at wood tavern), don't sweat it, guys. just enjoy yourself when you're out and with your friends. media vs media articles are useless.

pod_nt
pod_nt topcommenter

Even the basic facts were inaccurate. But what would one expect of an advertorial rag like Complex? Gotta keep those advertising pennies flowing in from the sugar water companies. 

cpchester
cpchester topcommenter

Frankly, the list read more like a review of the most successful bars and clubs in Miami. 

CHONGALICIOUS
CHONGALICIOUS

HAVE YOU READ THE REST OF HER LIST?? COMPLETELY BIASED!!  THAT BITCH HAS HUGE CLUBS, SMALL VENUES, TOURIST TRAPS, AND LOCAL BARS ALL ON THE SAME LIST....

murdermysterymiami
murdermysterymiami

@jazz the writer lived in south Florida but now lives in NYC, according to her Linkedin Page.

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