via nerdarama.com

​Nerds are we, and geeks, and dorks. Like normals, we take up the fork. We eat and drink as much as you, but make our foods a tribute too. From Trek, to Wars, to toons, and shrooms, to Potter, Lost, and Iphones too. Sit back and laugh at what we do, remember nerds are people too.

Here are our Top 15 geek tributes to nerd culture made with food.
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Jacob Katel

Not on the list, but you still should, and then Sandwicherie across the street.

​If you've ever walked out of a bar drunk and hungry and bought a gas station sandwich then you probably appreciate a joint with a menu.

Miami-Dade is full of them. From Kendall to the Grove, Allapattah to the river, even on the 57th badlands edging Coral Gables some of the coolest bars around are also a great place to grab a bite.

Here are our top five local food and drink joints you should know about.
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via Liz and Dave on Travelpod

Guess what.

​People to the south of Miami think America's chemical-laden, hormone-injected, infinite shelf-lifed, processed, packaged, industrially produced, lab-tested, factory-farmed food is crazy.

But they eat jungle creatures. Now that's weird.

Here are our top 5 really strange (totally natural and organic) foods of South America and the Caribbean.
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​Forget all about world hunger, poverty, genocide, war, torture, natural disasters, evil regimes, oil, terrorism, the environment, animal rights, and all that other stupid hippy crap, and let's focus for just a minute on what's really important: discontinued junk foods we wanna see back on the market. Here are our top five.
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The iPhone is annoying for some, addictive for others. Love or hate it, the phone has won over a lot of us. And it's only natural that among the thousands of applications made for it, there would be many catering to cooks and food lovers. Though you might not be using these every day, you'd be surprised at how they randomly come in handy. Here our favorite five.

5. Wine Ph.D ($4.99)

​Serious wine lovers can search the database by wine name, producer, varietal, region, and food pairings. For the less wine savvy, it comes in handy at the store if you want to see tasting notes and ratings on what you're about to buy or if you need a wine that pairs well with what you're eating later.

Runnerup: Fromage ($2.99). For the cheese lover, this database tells you what you need to know about a particular cheese and which wines it pairs with.
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http://www.flickr.com/photos/dearsomeone/ / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

Artie circa 2006, California.

​What's fat, funny, loves dope, and makes Howard Stern laugh?

We haven't seen Artie Lange in Miami since January last year, when he was promoting his book Too Fat to Fish at Book & Books in Coral Gables.

He was hilarious -- a cool, humble dude who signed everybody's books and took a million pictures, and we'd love to have him back in the 305.

Well, the 41-year-old was recently rushed to a New Jersey hospital for unreported reasons.

Lange has had numerous problems with drugs and alcohol, and like John Belushi, Chris Farley, and Jerry Garcia before him, he also loves to eat and smoke cigarettes.

Instead of throwing Lange under the bus for the stupid shit he does, we'd rather celebrate it.

Here are our top five pics of Artie Lange eating.
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lee klein

No more pâté at Pied

​Au Pied de Cochon: "Just what we needed", we crowed back in July -- a dazzling 1940s-style 24/7 indoor/outdoor South Beach bistro serving country French fare in a fun setting. And boy those mustard-coated, bread crumbed pig trotters were tasty, as were the lamb chops, and the pork shank too. Alas, the best laid plans of rice and hen...

Cacao: The corvina ceviche, wild boar anticucho, corn soufflé with dipping sauces...the roasted quail swollen with chicken and chorizo mousse! Venezuelan chef Edgar Leal's vibrant contemporary Latin American cooking made this restaurant a favorite of ours during its seven successful years. This is one Cacao we wish didn't melt away.
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Ah, the holiday season. The perfect time to pick terrible gifts for people whose passions you don't understand. We're not saying these are bad products, they all look like perfectly reasonable chef gadgets, cooking tools, and kitchen ware. We're just saying these are the Top 6 worst gifts for home cooks, professional chefs, and amateur culinary artists. We know your bakers, gourmets, and foodies love kitchen gifts for their Christmas and Hanukkah presents, but trust us, don't get them these.

6. Onion Goggles

Can I get those in Aviator?

​Nothin' tells your special cook to quit cryin' like, "Bitch put on those Onion Goggles and make me a damn sandwich."
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http://www.flickr.com/photos/restlessglobetrotter/ / CC BY 2.0

Something's rotten in Fridgemark.

​A near emtpy fridge and a growling stomach have driven many men (women, and children) to desperate measures. And though there are plenty of things you shouldn't eat after they've been sitting around a certain amount of time (pizza, sushi, meatloaf), there are foods with an infinite shelf life. Here's our Top 5 list of foods that don't spoil, rot, or expire.
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public domain image by Marc Averette via wikimedia commons.

Construction behind the Freedom Tower, downtown Miami 2007, building for tomorrow.

​ Downtown Miami is a special place, especially because zoning laws allow for 24 hour liquor licensing. Damn right.

Art Basel 2009 Miami brings with it a week of satellite fairs, many of them concentrated where most of the Design District and Wynwood galleries and Northern Downtown event spaces are, and right around the burgeoning club and entertainment district that includes Club Space, The Arsht Center, and The Vagabond.

Here are some places to eat in the area of Pulse, Scope, and Max Fish that you probably won't read about anywhere else. Also check out volumes 1 & 2 of our Art Basel Miami 2009 restaurant guides for Wynwood and the Design District, and our event guide for the whole week.

5. Mike's at Venetia - 555 NE 15th St, 9th Floor, Poolside

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A killer view, solid happy hour, and great history of reckless drunkitude backed by certified bar food and cocaine cowboy street cred. More >>